An Account of Time

The line went in August 23rd. Hopefully the line will be out in time to celebrate my 24th birthday and be short of the 7month mark of March 23rd.

To recount, mostly for my interest:

- I spent the first solid month in bed... essentially unable to walk up and down stairs or feed myself.
- I spent the next month almost in bed... sometimes able to journey out and about but always at a pretty substantial cost.
- I spent the next month sick and off IV... a result of one of the above journeys.
- I spent December and Jan slowly working my way up the block until I hit the revered "corner"

Within the last two months I've spent my time as follows within a given week:
- 8 hours of infusing time
- 1 hour of flushing lines, prepping for infusing and finishing infusing
- 1 hour of dressing change and blood draw
- 2 hours going to an integrated medicine guy in Trumbull
- 2 hours going to and fro my therapist (apparently chronic illness isn't good for the psyche)
- 2 hours (at least) on the phone to the insurance company, the doctors office or CVS
- 1.15 hours a week getting a massage (to get the toxins out and boost the immune system)

Total of hours spent per week on illness: 17.15 hours.
Total number of months spent on IV: 5months (soon to be 6)
Total amount of anger: large
Total amount of acceptance: small
Total amount of belief that this is the last treatment I'm going to have: non-existent

To be honest, I am scared about getting the line out. Scared because I might have to go back on, scared because I don't feel 100% yet and scared because it's going to end 6months of my "routine" and it might be the only routine I can keep.